‘I am not my hair’
That sentence seems straightforward, right? Apparently not. I bumped into the subject last week when I told one of my close guy friends that I’m going to cut my hair short. The expression on is face was one of terror, immediately he said :’ No, don’t do that!! Shocked by his reaction, I responded ‘My hair does not define my beauty.’ He looked at my face and then looked away leaving minutes of silence. I’ve realised that a minute can become very long. Longer than my hair it seems.
The reaction of my friend sparked curiosity. For one: he knows me well. It is not some shallow person. He knows my character, my personality and my story and still the subject of me cutting my hair hit him hard. I start to wonder, how does other people see me? People that know me and people that do not know me. I started telling people I do not know that well, that I’m going to cut my hair. They seem to not care, their response would be like ‘oh, cool.Why do you want to cut your hair?’ When in contrary the people that have seen me grow in my personality and character and knows me well, well… They had the same response as my friend. My loving mom (she is a very good person) started weeping, she got a tormenting dream about about shaving my head.
I went through my Facebook pictures to see where I have cut my hair. I’ve cut my hair before in different styles. This time I would just cut all of it off. I’ve realised that there is a lot of comments on my hair. I’ve even been tagged in ‘Tag the person you know with the most beautiful hair.’
Do some cultures put more value to hair? Is it an universal thing? I grew up with a mixed race people group. We have black,white,Indian, Asian,kleurling, green, purple, zebra etc. There’s a reason we are called a rainbow nation.
This was an unexpected eye – opener for me. That hair can become the embodiment of beauty, and people can start to associate you with your hair. In my case, it is not necessarily a bad thing or a good thing. Given that my culture puts a lot of value on hair. However, if I got the same response three years ago, that people gave me about my hair, I probably would have cried, and found my identity in my hair. My self – esteem would have been low. Thus, I’ve been on a journey knowing who I am in God. That gave me so much identity. I am pure, righteous and beautiful before God. I’m desired, I’m fully known with all my flaws and yet unconditionally loved. I love my face, my hair and my body, but that is not what defines me. It is part of me, but a very small part. You would want to get to know the rest of me, because God did an amazing job.
So am I cutting my hair or not (or did I already cut it *wink) Indeed, my hair is going. Why am I cutting my hair? For the same reason I wanted to from the beginning… which was ‘I just want to, hair grows back’ I don’t have a deep reason. But I do have very deep people in my life, and I love all of you. Thanks for giving me input on what you think of me cutting my hair. Nonetheless, if I’m bold or grey you should still be able to look at my face, at the end of the day, it is just hair.
What do you think of your hair? What does your culture say about your hair.? What is your hair story? And what does it say about you?
Let me know, we all have our stories 🙂