Dear future husband

You want to impress me with being a gangster, living that thug life- Don’t bother. I’ve lived the thug life. No- not the glamorous kind. The kind where you actually wish that some of your loved ones would die, so that there could be enough food to go around. 

Not the thug life,  because you wear a shirt on Instagram that says #thuglife.  The real life were three of us were running, and I saw my best friend trip and got shot in the head. Dead. The thug life where you lay on that floor, holding your breathe, because if they hear you breathe it might be you that’s dead next.

You want to impress me with money, grand cars and who you know- Don’t even bother. I know money, I know what’s it like to live in the top hotels in Switzerland and London.  I drove cars you would never be able to afford. Knowing ‘this one and that one’ has no value. People with a rich reputation, have to uphold it constantly.  People who don’t care about how they are perceived are much more happier. I prefer happier people above the Prince of the universe.

You want to impress me with your so called eye opening, third eye, forth eye, secret knowledge, mystical stuff- Don’t bother. I’ve been deeper in witch craft than your great grand father was. Illuminati gibberish does not entertain me, neither does it impress me, or intrigue me.  Tell me, have you lived and grew up with a witch doctor?  Or are you just going of off research and what you hear. Or do you crave evil power so much that you spent all your nights researching witchcraft or whatever fancy word its called nowadays. Experiencing just goosebumps and taking it as a supernatural experience.  Have you been face to face with Satan and realised that not all devils have horns, but some are actually the pastor in church. I’ve been literally sacrificed by satanist and the power of God ripped me out of that bondage. So the next time you want to talk about why God is not God, try getting shot in your head and coming out alive. And then tell me it’s because you are just so incredibly awesome.

You want to impress me because you are a foreigner from the most elite families- Don’t bother. I dated elites.  They are the most lonely people I have met. They are so poor all they have is money.

You want to impress me with your “I go every Sunday to church”, ” I have bible knowledge”, “I’m so holy I baptise people in a Jacuzzi in  Jesus name”. If you need to impress me by bragging about it, that already defeats the purpose.  When you go around judging homosexuals, as if you were God. Speaking bad about the very church people you smile on Sunday with. Driving a Porch while your church members struggle to survive week by week due to no food. You preach the message of ‘church people should bless the man of God” These people give you their money with sincerity and you abuse it.  And you want to brag about your Porch? Do you now understand why people find it hard to trust us Christians?  Judging me by my face “Oh you are a model, fashion blogger” You probably don’t know much about God”  The thing about judging a book by its cover is that you don’t know what’s inside.  I studied the bible in deep. I read the bible over 5times in 9 months,  writing tests, exams, preaching and teaching and the message I walked away was LOVE GOD AND LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOUR AS YOURSELF. Not some theology that whoever wrote. That gives you the right to judge everyone. We are righteous by faith not by goodworks. We live by faith not by sight..

You want to impress me with your looks or status- Don’t bother. Some of my very good friends are models. As handsome as it gets. But beauty fades and charm is deceptive,  but a human that’s humble is worth more than pearls.

If you really want to get my attention-

  • Stay, when it’s easier to leave.
  • Understand the definition of commitment. We live in an era that make not committing so convenient.  You can buy clothes and take it back as soon as you find fault with it, don’t want it or are tired of it. There’s so many products on the market, so when you get tired of one, it’s convenient to get another one. People laugh at the idea of marriage. “You want to be with one person for the rest of your life haha.” Commitment means sticking it out when it difficult.  Commitment doesn’t mean ‘I commit to you until it doesn’t work for me anymore.”
  • Love is not a feeling, it’s a decision.  Sure it feels good in the beginning. Our brains actually releases hormones similar to the feeling of drug addicts. I wrote a post about how love effect our brain and behaviour in the beginning of a relationship. If you want to read it click here. Eventually the feelings of “in-love” fades, and then what’s left? You with a person you are frustrated with. If you want my attention realise that here is the point that you choose to love me. I choose to love you. We might not feel like it, but like I said love isn’t a feeling but a choice.
  • Don’t go into relationship when you are not mature enough.
  • You will find other people attractive. Being in a relationship or marriage doesn’t magically make all other women or men unattractive. It’s here you have to make a choice to respect your partner enough to look away and by doing  that honouring your partner. It doesn’t have to be broadcast, it happens in the moments when no one is watching, its only you and the decision you have to make. Many people do not want to face this, but it is there. You will find other people attractive.  Study the human brain and how it works. (I can write an article about it if someone wants to know) Finding other people attractive doesn’t mean that you sleep with them, openly flirt with them or just spending more and more time with them, while having a partner. If you still think that is fine, you are still immature,  or you need to find someone that is like minded like you. She will do the same to you.

Oh and to the nice guys. Everyone says you are a nice guy. And you also believe you are. Nice guys can be jerks also. Don’t flatter yourself. If you do the same hurtful things and make empty promises you are the same. Just because you read your bible and visit Africa to feed the poor doesn’t mean that you cannot be a jerk.

Hey lovers!!

I realise the title is Dear future husband, but then I started writing and all of these words came out of my finger tips. I included a lot of myself in this post, but I also kept you in mind. The words “man” and “women” can be used vice versa. I’m not saying men are bad or women are bad.  The place I’m at right now I just needed to get it out of my system.  So many men have been approaching me lately, and today at the beach I just burst into a rant 😚

I’ll be posting this one the page “Letters” Please check it out 🙂


26 thoughts on “Dear future husband

  1. Sorry that you could not go to the beach without being hustled, it is strange that guy’s will just chase after a beautiful woman, rather than try and see if they have anything in common or something that they can share. I thought the piece was great, it needs a wide audience, so will re-blog it and share it on Facebook. Charles.


    • Wow Charles! Thank you so much. Reblogging means so much. I never thought that people would actually reblog. And now it’s happening.

      You asked earlier if I ended up swimming, by this post you probably understand why we left 🙂

      It was still fun driving around 🙂 The views are very beautiful over there.

      I was just on your about page, and I really really love that quote about peace. It speaks so much to me!

      I hope you have a great night! Send my greetings and love to the family. 💚💟💝

      Blessings and peace! 😊😊😊

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Dear future husband – You need to know this | Chantal and Shekinah
  3. You liked a post on my instagram, thank you. I saw your information and decided to take a look and I’m glad I did. I really liked this post and will be checking your other ones out. Have a great day!


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